Discipline.

Ugh! Discipline. We've got to, right?!

Although Rylie looks like the most preciously sweet and innocent little girl...take if from her mommy...she is! She's just as perfect as they come. She listens to every thing we say. She never shouts "no!" And she never pushes our buttons...ever!

Ha! Who am I kidding?! Just at one single glance, you can tell that our beautiful daughter is as ornery as they come. RUBY!!!! Have you been praying for a pay back? :) Because, according to my mom, I was an angel. :)

But, unforunately, Rylie's ornery behavior has caused me to feel a bit convicted (shouldn't that be the other way around?). Maybe convicted isn't the right word. But allow me to explain.

When Rylie acts out, rebels, throws a fit, shouts no!, or does anything that warrants some form of discipline, we don't just turn our back and pretend she isn't acting that way. We believe in firmly voicing our disapproval. We believe in time-out. We believe in spankings (I think). But it's the spankings that causes me to feel convicted. It leaves me questioning our method of discipline and wondering if it was just a lack of patience on our part. Is that even a method that we want to continue to use?! And if so, why does it affect me the way it does?! I understand that most parents don't enjoy spanking their children. But this has been on my mind a lot lately so I felt the urge to blog about it. And if anyone has any advice they would like to share...feel free. We're kind of new at this...given that Rylie is our first child to reach the "terrible-two's." And we've never claimed to be "parenting-pros."

Anyway...

I highly doubt that we become non-spanking parents (that sounds weird, lol!). But honestly, I have found that Rylie reacts better to her "discipline" if I get down to her level, speak in a very firm but quiet voice, explain what she is doing wrong and ask her to act differently. Most of the time, I have to remove her from the atmosphere that we are in so that it's just the two of us...she focuses better this way! HOWEVER, she is becoming even more stubborn than she was before. And sometimes, she reacts by arching her back while simultaneously screaming and crying and flinging her arms up in an attempt to squirm out of my hands and go back to the very thing that she isn't supposed to be doing in the first place. Whew! Now what?! We first threaten spankings. And if that doesn't help...we follow through (because I have learned from Super Nanny that follow-through is the most important part of discipline- I LOVE her!). But even though our spankings are controlled, I still can't rid the idea that a spanking might not be an effective way to discipline (for us, anyway). It bothers me. But I also want to raise our children to listen. Respect. And to behave in a nice and civilized way. Ahhhhh!!!! In most cases, I believe in avoidance. Please don't confuse this with avoiding the discipline that should follow a bad behavior. What I mean is that if a parent knows that a child doesn't behave well in certain atmospheres or during certain times throughout the day...avoid that situation. Some parents may feel that this method doesn't teach them anything and it certainly doesn't teach them how to act properly in those situations. But really...how fair is it to place your child in a situation that you already predict will cause reason for discipline? However, I will contradict myself here and say that there are times that a parent has no choice but to take their child(ren) to a place that they predict may cause misbehavior. And then, the parent is left feeling anxious and nervous during the entire time they are there because they don't exactly know how their child(ren) will react. Then what?! :)

Wow! This parenting stuff is hard. But then again...I am an over-thinker.