The Love Dare

When I think about my past and reflect on the 14th day of each February...I immediately think of Amanda and Jenny, who share this holiday with their birthdays. But then my mind quickly takes me back to 3rd grade and I can literally visualize my homemade Valentine's Day card box and I am reminded of the anticipation I felt when counting the number of cards that soon filled that box! And I smile as I am also reminded of the giddiness I felt when finally coming to the card signed by my current crush. But then I flash forward a few years and am reminded of the awkwardness that was created by a major 7th grade break-up the day before Valentine's Day. Then it's high school and I am struggling to find the perfect gift for my high school sweetheart. I always came up short and remember my gifts being rather cheesy. A balloon, some candy, a stuffed animal (what guy wants a stuffed jayhawk anyway)...and I suddently realize that I was never really that "good" of a Valentine. And honestly, I still feel that I have, kind of, "failed" to live up to the expectations of this holiday.

But not this year!!

Every day, I pray that Brian and I live a life that glorifies God and that we live in a Godly marriage. One of my top priorities is to create an awesome example for my children to follow. And amongst many other things, loving and honoring your husband is definitely something I want to instill. And although I do love and honor Brian, I also acknowledge that I can do so much better with outwardly demonstrating this and have room to grow. But I'm making a conscious effort to do so.

And Brian, this is when you stop reading. :)

With Valentine's Day right around the corner, I have joined thousands of other people who listen to K-Love and have decided to follow the 40 day "Love Dare!" It started on Wednesday and goes until February 14th. And I would like to document this journey and invite others to do the same for their significant other.

So far...

Day 1: Love is Patient

"Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love." -Esphesians 4:2

Love works. It is life's most powerful motivator and has far greater depth than most people realize. It always does what is best for others and can empower us to face the greatest of problems. Love will inspire you to become a patient person. When you choose to be patient, you respond in a positive way to a negative situation. You are slow to anger. Patience makes us wise. It doesn't rush to judgment but listens to what the other person is saying. Patience helps you give your spouse permission to be human. It understands that everyone fails.

Day 1 Dare: Resolve to demonstrate patience and to say nothing negative to your spouse at all.

Day 2: Love is Kind

"Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you." -Esphesians 4:32

Kindness is love in action. Patience avoids a problem; kindness creates a blessing. One is preventive, the other proactive. Love makes you kind. When you're kind, people want to be around you. They see you as being good to them and good for them. Love, in its truest sense, is not based on feelings. Rather, love determines to show thoughtful actions even when there seems to be no reward. You will never learn to love until you learn to demonstrate kindess.

Day 2 Dare: In addition to saying nothing negative to your spouse again today, do at least one unexpected gesture as an act of kindness.

Day 3: Love is not Selfish

"Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor." -Romans 12:10

If there were ever a word that basically means the opposite of love, it is selfishness. Unfortunately, it is something that is ingrained into every person from birth. However, loving couples- the ones who are enjoying a full purpose of marriage- are bent on taking good care of the other flawed human they get to share life with. That's because true love looks for ways to say "yes." One ironic aspect of selfishness is that even generous actions can be selfish if the motive is to gain bragging rights or receive a reward. Love also leads to inner joy. When you prioritize the well-being of your mate, there is a resulting fulfillment that cannot be duplicated by selfish actions. Nobody knows you as well as your spouse. And that means no one will be quicker to recognize a change when you deliberately start sacrificing your wants and wishes to make sure his or her needs are met.

Day 3 Dare: Along with restraining from negative comments, buy your spouse something that says "I was thinking of you today."

Okay...there. You are caught up. And now it's time for me to go buy something for Brian. :)